Methinks I was reading too much Dickens | Letters

Same as it ever was Methinks I was reading too much Dickens In 1906 I got sued for shaking a puppy When I was seven, a Brooklyn lawyer Which ran scared and hid his…

Methinks I was reading too much Dickens | Letters

Same as it ever was

Methinks I was reading too much Dickens

In 1906 I got sued for shaking a puppy

When I was seven, a Brooklyn lawyer

Which ran scared and hid his face

Shouting ‘I’m breaking the law!’

Mrs Bell was a kind woman

She sent me out of the attic

When the law said a boy’s gotta be crazy

She came down and held me

by the legs and my eyes went into my head

The charge was insanity, and the jury ruled

I was guilty. ‘Bout 100 years later

I caught myself giggling when I watched

The Mad Hatter say, ‘Let me be Your friend

‘Cause this is a living happy life.’

Methinks I was confusing life with whims

In 1939 Governor Wilson pushed a bill

Upstream to promote vaccinations

For calves and sick kids

Now, half a century on

I feel ashamed that I turned his mind

Downriver and drowned him.

Chloe was eight when she was immunized

And today she’s the youngest of me

I hope she wakes up unscathed

But my unvaccinated mate

Was affected by the pus

When he was five

And today he lives with the fear

Of his turgid past

Love is a vaccine that doesn’t hurt

It’s only against tiring, repetitive cruelty

By people with lips taped together

There is a hard world ahead of us

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